Sunday, September 22, 2013

Review: Vain by Fisher Amelie

Title: Vain
Author: Fisher Amelie
Genre: New Adult, Contemporary
Goodreads | The Book Depository | Amazon

If you're looking for a story about a good, humble girl, who's been hurt by someone she thought she could trust, only to find out she's not as vulnerable as she thought she was and discovers an empowering side of herself that falls in love with the guy who helps her find that self, blah, blah, blah...then you're gonna' hate my story,

Because mine is not the story you read every time you bend back the cover of the latest trend novel. It's not the "I can do anything, now that I've found you/I'm misunderstood but one day you'll find me irresistible because of it" tale. Why? Because, if I was being honest with you, I'm a complete witch. There's nothing redeeming about me. I'm a friend using, drug abusing, sex addict from Los Angeles. I'm every girlfriend's worst nightmare and every boy's fantasy.

I'm Sophie Price...And this is the story about how I went from the world's most envied girl to the girl no one wanted around and why I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.
Review by Nara

Firstly, if you're looking for a story that sounds like the blurb above, you're looking in the wrong place. This book is NOTHING like it suggests and EVERYTHING the blurb says it isn't.

Discovers an empowering side of herself that falls in love with the guy who helps her find that self. Check.
Latest trend novel. Check.
"I can do anything, now that I've found you". Check.
"I'm misunderstood but one day you'll find me irresistible because of it". Check. Also, totally clumsy sentence.
I'm a complete witch. Wrong.
There's nothing redeeming about me. Wrong.
I'm every girlfriend's worst nightmare and every boy's fantasy. Eh, could be.

The only statement which is spot on (at least at the start of the novel) is I'm a friend using, drug abusing sex addict from Los Angeles. Which, of course, makes the protagonist ever so likable. Basically, I found her to be a rich brat. Evidence:
1. I was "the green fairy". I flitted into you life, showed you ecstasy, and left you dependent. I did this for fun, for the hell of it, for attention. I wanted to be wanted, and my word, did they want me. Did they ever.

2. Like I said, I was practically flawless.

3. I would never have admitted this to anyone, but I panicked if I hadn't seen a mirror in a few hours, affirming I still had the only thing that made me so adored.
Firstly, that sentence is a grammatical disaster. Secondly, really???

Sophie is busted one day taking drugs by the police and therefore, completely logically, sent to an orphanage in Uganda. Umm, does that happen? Is that even legal?? Are you allowed to ship out criminals to other countries like that??? To take the ridiculousness further, the characters go to save kids in a village that has been ravaged by the LRA. What the hell? I'm somewhat torn in my opinion of the book, because on the one hand, it's somewhat well thought out and reasonably well written, and on the other hand, it's completely rubbish. I found that Sophie's "redemption" was stupid. Further annoying me was the fact that she cries on every freaking second page and says "oh my word" (who the hell even says that?!).

For those who have read the book, or don't mind it being spoiled, going further into the realm of disbelief:
Click me to read spoilers

I found it completely heartless that she could just pull the trigger and kill two men in a matter of seconds with no hesitation and no regret. Also, I'm pretty sure there would be some legal and moral issues regarding this. Come on...

In addition, the spelling and grammatical errors were kind of annoying. I found this excerpt exceptionally horrendous:
I suppose that's what leant him additional intimidation factor as an attorney. I believe he played it up when possible. I also believe he was a virgin. For one reason: He lived and breathed his job. For another, I couldn't imagine a single woman taking pity on the poor man. Then again, he was rich, who was I to say?

Here's a line spoken by Sophie:
"As an American, I can definitely identify that my country has little to no idea what poverty really is. The worst living conditions I'd ever been exposed to back home pale in comparison. It's literally embarrassing that we complain at all"
WTF. Seriously, WTF. I find it difficult to believe that a teenager/young adult (can't remember how old she is) would speak like this. Also, generalisation much? I doubt that rich bitch Sophie would have been exposed to ANYTHING even nearing poverty. And just because a country is a first world country, that doesn't mean that there isn't poverty there.

If you want a book where the protagonist is one that sounds like the one in this blurb, go read Dirty Red.

Didn't like it

Overall: 3/10
Plot: 2/5
Writing: 3/5
Characters: 3/5
Cover: 1/5


  1. Yay! I hated Vain SO much. Glad to hear I'm not alone in my dislike ;) She was a vain and entitled rich brat from start to end.

    1. *hi-fives*
      It's ridiculous how high the GR rating is for this one! Just don't understand what people see in this book...

  2. I don't think I would even pick this one up, based on the synopsis. Not my thing. But now that I know what kind of writing is in it, I'll be doubly sure to stay away!

    1. I actually wrote this review a while back, and didn't get a chance to publish it til now. Around the time that I read the book, I'd recently read Dirty Red, and so wanted to read a book that had a similarly unlikeable MC. Well, clearly, the MC was unlikeable in this one, but for different reasons to the one in Dirty Red. Staying away from this book is probably a good idea haha

  3. Hahaha oh dear it sounds like a painful read Nara! I hate it when a blurb sells us the idea of a book but it doesn't turn out to be like that at all. And the whole shipping criminals out to Uganda, What?!

    Anyway, I won't be picking this one up.

    Jeann @ Happy Indulgence

    1. I KNOW RIGHT! Freaking misleading blurbs...
      Yeah, I'm quite sure that sending criminals to Uganda would be illegal. Or at least highly morally questionable.

  4. I wasn't particularly interested in this one, and after this: "This book is NOTHING like it suggests and EVERYTHING the blurb says it isn't." I REALLY am not now. Ugh, I hate it when I get cheated by a book, and this one sounds like the worst kind. :(

    Getting sent to an orphanage - in UGANDA - for taking drugs? Is that even possible in the first place?! But yeah, what kind of screwed-up family would let that happen? I mean, it would be much more sensible to send your kid for counseling instead of just giving her up completely. "Further annoying me was the fact that she cries on every freaking second page and says "oh my word" (who the hell even says that?!)." - Protagonists who cry all the time just grate on my nerves. I get that we've got feelings, but hey, I'm a pretty sensitive person and I don't cry every day. And ha, only people who are trying to redeem themselves.

    And DUDE. She kills two men? Without remorse? I starting to seriously question her insanity, and I think she might be right about what she said about herself: "There's nothing redeeming in me." And I'm also thinking that she might've been possessed by only seven demons throughout the entire book. See? I haven't even read this and I dislike her already!

    Atrocious writing doesn't really pull me in either. Add that with an annoying main character, and there's me running for the hills. I honestly can't believe how the average rating on GR got to be so high. O_O Sorry you had to go through this torture, Nara. Though you have to admit, it can get kind of fun picking on books and being snarky about them, no? That's a little bit of how I felt about SILENT ECHO, heh. Definitely staying far, far away from this one!

    1. STUPID MISLEADING BLURBS. Why do people do that?! Random, but I also hate it when the entire book is spoiled in a blurb. So annoying.

      I KNOW RIGHT!! I mean, taking drugs isn't even THAT big an offence. Really, being fined or community service would be the extent of what I'd expect as punishment! Yeah, people crying excessively in books seriously annoys me...

      haha she actually does redeem herself in the end, which is why the blurb is stupid. I mean, I guess the redeeming process was ridiculous, but she still technically does it.'s silly to think that a spoiled brat can just take a gun and shoot two people with no regret at all. So unrealistic...

      hahaha I do agree, it's quite fun writing snarky negative reviews :P

  5. Eeeee, this one doesn't sound good at all. Everything you said about the MC is really off-putting, I wouldn't be able to tolerate that. Sounds pretty unrealistic as well, although I do somewhat like the cover more than you did xD Great review!

    1. haha I just dislike closeups of people on covers. So that's why it has a low cover rating :P
      It's seriously unrealistic. I don't understand all the people who are like "OMG this book was so realistic" it's like, buddy, have you ever seen someone sent to Uganda for taking drugs??

  6. Oh wow, I would've been intrigued by the cover and synopsis. Sucks that it was a total bust and wasn't at all what you thought. I hate it when that happens. I guess I can skip this one then! Great review!

    AKA Vi3tBabe
    Deity Island

    1. A lot of people did enjoy this one, though, so perhaps you might too!
      I just really disliked it because of all the ridiculous plot holes and because of how unrealistic it was.

  7. I want a book that delivers what it promises. It is incredibly frustrating when a blurb doesn't match the book at all. I just don't think I will ever read Vain. From what you've said, the main character seems so annoying. I am already sick of how many times she says "I". The writing style and I would not mix well. I don't think her sentences made a lot of grammatical sense, either.

    And getting shipped off to Uganda? WHAT? Um, no, I don't believe that would ever happen for getting busted taking drugs. Or ever, for that matter.

    Thank you for the warning!

    1. Yeah the grammar wasn't that great in general. I think it's by an indie author, so maybe it hasn't really been properly edited? I don't know...

      Quite true. I'm pretty sure criminals would never be casually shipped off to Uganda- especially for such a petty crime like taking drugs.